


There's Nothing New to Do in Brooklyn

by chaotictaako



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: Angst, Attempted Murder, Brooklyn, Depressing, M/M, Rating May Change, Slow Burn, im serious this is going to be a hella slow burn but it'll be worth it, im sorry, kevin and con live in new york, mcpricely - Freeform, post-uganda, slow-ish updates, there's something wrong with kevin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-07
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2019-01-10 04:14:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12291018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaotictaako/pseuds/chaotictaako
Summary: after Uganda, something in Kevin Price just...broke. He had never failed before. He didn't have a purpose.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> aight so im going to be publishing chapters a few at a time hopefully so while updates will be lowkey slow they'll be pretty rich w content. also this is gonna be a super slow slowburn bc kev's really damaged??? anyways im s o?? so r yr ?? for this?? it's based off of this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPAKFZ9hLbo&index=1&list=PLb4noDoNlTdha4QsjKHy0CiT95pixGXW1

Streets. Signs. People. All of it’s the fucking same. Everything feels the same. Kevin shoved his hands in his pockets, trudging his way down the Brooklyn streets. How did he get here? Gosh, everything seemed like a damn blur after Uganda. He failed and Connor left and- Shit, where  _ was _ Connor nowadays? Whatever, it didn’t matter. Just like his past or his family or Arnold. Nothing mattered anymore. So he moved to New York with what little money he had and lived a secluded life in a shitty apartment in Brooklyn. ‘ _ Greatest city in the world my ass’  _ Kevin thought bitterly with a chuckle. Whatever, it’s better than Uganda. 

         Kevin sighed, staring blankly at a curly-haired toddler who waved at him. He didn’t feel anything. Was that concerning? Probably, but it wasn’t a priority for the ex-mormon. It didn’t seem like anything was a priority to him anymore. It didn’t seem like he could _feel_ anything anymore. He’d been living here for about - what? Two years now? It didn’t seem like anything had changed. Well, anything but him. Kevin had grown from an ambitious, naïve 19-year-old to a sleep-deprived 22-year-old who seemed just about devoid of emotion. His coffee addiction was long past healthy and probably the only thing keeping him alive at this point. 

        Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted his neighbor crossing the street to talk to him. Fuck. Putting on a façade of politeness, Kevin grinned at his neighbor. She smiled back, waving nervously. “H- uh, hey, Kevin! Are you doing anything.. Are you doing anything tonight?” She asked, playing with her dark hair. Kevin stared at her for a second, trying to remember her name. It was something like..uh… well, whatever, it wasn’t important. “Yeah, I’ve got plans, sorry!” he lied, suddenly tired of the interaction. Ugh, this was the worst. “What you been up to?” Kevin asked, beginning to plan his escape from the conversation. Obviously not expecting the question despite the unoriginality of it, her face flushed slightly. “Oh, y’know, just...trying to find a nice guy. It’s so lonely in my apartment..” She sighed wistfully. Kevin, struggling to not make a passive aggressive remark, nodded. “Yeah, finding nice guys seems to be hard. Anyways, I better go.” he spoke quickly, dropping the pleasant act. Going to say something, the girl opened her mouth and quickly shut it as Kevin brushed past her. Damnit, at this rate he was going to be late for work. Work was the only important thing in Kevin’s life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, updates are definitely going to be less on weekdays but like idk?? enjoy?? also feel free to leave comments!! i feel so frickin cool when i get comments so

      When work was finally over, Kevin shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket. It was mid-October and the weather was beginning to grow colder. Tonight he would probably just go and get wasted at a bar and hook-up with a guy at least 10 years older than him and then repeat the same thing tomorrow. It seemed like everything he did nowadays was to spite the church. If Kevin before Uganda could see him now...damn, he wouldn’t know what to think. The sun was setting with a mix of peaches and pinks and purples and any other person would have taken a second to admire it but that just wasn’t who Kevin was anymore. Arriving at a seedy gay bar on a street he barely recognized, Kevin ran a hand through his hair. Did he look decent? Quickly, he checked out his reflection in a nearby window. It might have been the obscuration in his reflection, but he definitely looked tired. Ugh. 

       Brushing it off, Kevin entered the bar and was immediately engulfed in the obnoxiously loud music and neon decor. It was already kind of giving him a migraine, but whatever. Doesn’t matter. He made his way across the room, rolling his eyes at an older man who smacked his ass. Not his type. Kevin sat down at the bar, the faux velvet seats coated in a strange gunk that the brunet man didn’t particularly want to think about. Meeting eyes with the girl to his side, he sighed. Ordering the cheapest beer he could find, Kevin only took his eyes away from the floor when a redheaded man sat next to him and grinned nervously. Staring at the other for a second, Kevin’s face fell. It wasn’t Connor. Whatever, he’d take what he could get. “Hey,” Kevin spoke, calculating his moves to best make an advance on the slightly shorter man. “What’s up?”

“Stuff,” The other answered teasingly, taking a sip of the fruity-looking drink he was nursing. “Specific,”    
“Shut up.” 

“Yeah? Make me.” Kevin responded quickly, effectively quieting the other for the moment. He took a smug drink of beer, watching the redhead for them to make the next move. He didn’t. Ugh. “So what’s your name?” Kevin asked him, beginning to grow impatient. Yeah, it usually took a while for guys to be swayed, but he wasn’t in any mood to wait. He just wanted a clean hookup, no strings attached that he could forget about within the next few days. “Ryan. You?”

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> h ey this is late and shittyb ut hey??? the plots approaching?? choo choo???
> 
> tw// attempted murder

         The next morning- shit, what time was it? It felt early. Groaning quietly at the blinding light emanating from his phone. It was about 5 am and it looks like Ryan had already snuck out. Good, less complications and half-hearted apologies. Why did he still feel so numb though? Fuck, when did he become this way? This wasn’t healthy. This wasn’t good. He wanted to feel  _ something  _ for once. He didn’t have to go to work for a while so he had time to sit and figure something out. Pushing himself out of bed, he decided to go for a walk and see if anything came to mind.

          Something needed to happen. Something big. Well, as big as you can get in Brooklyn while its raining and cold and miserable. Exiting the apartment building, Kevin sighed. His hair, even though it had only been exposed to the downpour for a moment was already clinging to his forehead and face. Only a couple people were out in the rain; few being crazy enough to walk around in this weather. A family of tourists rushed by him, the childrens’ ginger curls sticking to the sides of their face. A businessman with an umbrella on the phone, two girls holding hands and laughing and running, a punk looking person of indeterminate gender identity and a couple of teenagers using various jackets and bags as stand-in umbrellas. That was everyone else out on the street at the moment. Kevin kept walking, observing as less and less people appeared on the streets. A few streets later, Kevin spotted a woman standing by herself.

             Approaching her, an idea sprung into his head. It was illegal, but it was something to do. Something big. Running up and grabbing her by her dark hair, Kevin gritted his teeth. The woman immediately grew frantic, struggling to escape his grip and shouting expletives. His face steady, he went to move his grip and she managed to slip away. Shit. He chased her for a few blocks, slowly running out of breath with the turns regardless of the adrenaline. 

             Finally, he succeeded in trapping her in an alleyway, a darker gleam in his eyes than before. Realizing the mistake she’d made, the woman opted to stand her ground and not back away from Kevin. Still a bad choice. Kevin took a few steps towards her again, a flicker of doubt shining in his eye for a split second. This wasn’t the right thing to do. But wasn’t it? He couldn’t think of a better way to feel… well, something. Anything. The woman was shaking, her breath unsteady in her chest and her eyes darting wildly around. Kevin rushed up to her again, wrapping his hands around his neck and slamming her up against one of the sides of the alley. 

             Her struggling began less and less as she ran out of air and energy and Kevin tightened his grip. Gritting his teeth, Kevin was about to finish her off when he heard a shout from the opening of the alleyway. “Kevin Price?”

            Dropping the woman instantly, Kevin turned to see who it was who called his name and froze. Oh, God.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HE'S HERE

          “Kevin Price?” The voice called out, it’s sound ringing throughout the small entrance. Kevin whipped around, dropping the woman in his haste. She sputtered for breath, eyes wild with fear and confusion. Seeing a flash of strawberry blond running towards him, Kevin froze. At the manic look in his eyes, the other seemed to slow down. “Kevin..? It’s- what are you doing?” The other asked, eyes narrowed defensively. It was Connor. Oh God, it was Connor. “Nothing that concerns you,” Kevin responded steadily, a hint of pride in his voice. Noticing the woman behind him, Connor quickly pushed past Kevin to reach her. Kneeling down and taking her head in his hands, he whipped around to stare at the taller man.

         “What happened to you?” Connor asked, his voice practically dripping with terror. Not waiting for an answer, the ginger turned back to help the woman. “Breathe, come on,” He mumbled, checking her pulse on her wrist. “Come on!” his voice rose in agitation, pulling out his phone to search what to do. Still propping her head up, Connor inspected the bruises on her neck in the shape of Kevin’s hands as he desperately scrolled a medical site. Kevin couldn’t help but stare at Connor as he tried to help the woman, who was barely grasping onto a strand of consciousness.Oh, God. The realization of what Kevin had done flooded into his mind and he stumbled backwards. Staring at his former friend and the woman in horror. Kevin felt his spirit plummet. He felt something, but not what he wanted. He felt guilty. Ashamed. Everything he felt at the collapse of the mission came bursting through the mental dam he had built in his mind. A tear streaming down his face, Kevin went to back out of the alley and run, but Connor grabbed his wrist just before he did. “Listen,” the other started, voice heavily controlled, “I don’t know what happened to you, but this can’t continue. Stay here,” He instructed, the authoritative voice Kevin remembered from Uganda present in the other. The redhead stared at the other, looking for some kind of signal that he would listen. 

         Kevin knelt down beside Connor, looking at the woman. She met his gaze with justified fear. Checking her wounds himself, Kevin sighed. “I am so sorry,” He mumbled, knowing his apology didn’t justify his actions. “I- Please don’t involve the police. I’ll do anything” Kevin begged, searching her eyes for a response. She attempted to sit up, sputtering for breath and for the right words to say. “I-” She wheezed, staring directly at Kevin. “I won’t go to the- the police, but if you ever come near me I-” A breath. “I swear to god- I’ll get the nearest cop to arrest you,” She threatened, her breath raspy with her threat. Nodding, frankly intimidated by the woman, Kevin stood up and took a few steps back just for safety. After a second, Connor took over and helped the woman to her feet. “Where do you live?” He asked, gesturing for her to lean on him. “I can take you there and try to help with anything I can.” 

“That- thank you,” She responded, walking with Connor. The two slowly descended out of the alley, leaving the emotionally unstable Kevin behind. 

        Kevin stood in the now empty alley, staring at his hands. What the fuck was he supposed to do now? Go home? He guessed that was the only safe option at the moment. Walking home, he watched the rain-soaked people and streets pass by as he made his way to his small apartment. Arriving at the building, his mind shifted to Connor. How long had the other been there? What was Connor going to think of him? Trying to shrug off the thought for the moment, Kevin entered his dark apartment and collapsed on the couch with a sigh. He remembered his past self; so young, so dumb, so very in the closet. He missed that. Sure, the internalized homophobia and pressure to be the best Mormon he could be didn’t help his mental state, but he didn’t have a purpose anymore. That’s what Kevin needed. A purpose. That’s what Kevin didn’t have anymore. A purpose to live.


	5. Chapter 5

        It had been a week and Kevin hadn’t left his apartment. Four days in, his employer called to let him know that he was fired. Not showing up for four days unannounced probably wasn’t the best work habit. Regardless, it did nothing to help his mood. He only got up from his bed to eat and occasionally go to the bathroom if he absolutely needed to. Aside from that, he was stagnant. 

        Hearing a knock on the door, Kevin groaned in response. After the knocking continued, he pulled himself off his ass to go open it. It took him a second before he realized who it was. “Kevin, you look like shit,” Connor fussed, brushing past the other to get a loot at his apartment. “Oh my god, have you gone outside at all in the past few days?” He asked, turning around to look at the other. With Kevin’s lack of response, Connor had his answer. Rushing to clean up the mess that was Kevin’s home, the redhead sighed. “Is this because of the thing that happened? The woman’s name is Lucy by the way. And she’s holding up on not telling the police. Plus, she gave me her number; not that I particularly wanted it,” Connor rambled as he rushed around to pick up the clothes and household items that were strewn around the living room. Kevin slowly attempted to follow Connor around, waiting for a chance to interject. “I- Connor, not that I mind, but how the hell did you find my house?” He asked, sitting down on the couch for a moment. “I didn’t exactly tell you where I lived,” Kevin laughed slightly, sinking slowly into the fabric. Connor paused for a second, his pale cheeks noticeably tinting a light shade of pink. “Well.. uh- well, I-” He chuckled nervously, bending down to pick up a crumpled up flannel. At Kevin’s impatient look, Connor responded. “I- I looked up where you live, okay? I was worried about you,” He confessed, tossing the shirt onto the growing pile near him. Kevin gave the other an unimpressed look, nonchalantly brushing off the various crumbs from his slightly-too-small shirt. Connor let out a small sigh, disappearing into the singular hallway in search of Kevin’s room. 

       A few seconds later he came out with a fresh shirt and held it out to the other. “Get changed. I’ll- uh, I’ll be in the hallway to give you some privacy.” Connor cleared his throat awkwardly, only leaving when Kevin took the t-shirt. Kevin took his current, admittedly gross, shirt off and slipped the fresh one on. He probably needed a shower, but if Connor didn’t make him do it he wasn’t going to. Man, that was depressing. Once Connor returned, Kevin sighed. “Thanks, Connor,” He spoke, the name sounding strange and unfamiliar in his mouth. He figured that since the mission was over there was no point in referring to him as ‘Elder’ or by his last name. Evidently, it was weird for the other too as his face revealed a hint of surprise at the in-formalness of the gesture. 

      The two shared in a brief, uncomfortable silence. Neither of them knew what to say or do now. Clearing his throat, Kevin ran a hand through his disheveled hair. “So when did you move out here?” He asked, his voice monotone despite his genuine curiosity. Connor shrugged, looking the other up and down for any other signs of distress or messiness. “A couple months ago. I don’t- you?” The strawberry blond asked, almost saying more but deciding to hold back. Thinking for a moment, Kevin sighed. “Two years ago,” He responded, growing bored with the conversation. Evidently noticing this, Connor sighed, brushed himself off and heading to the door. “Well, I.. I’m going to get going. Try to get out sometime, okay? Lucy- Gosh, she intimidates me - Anyways, Lucy lives in New Jersey. I honestly doubt you’ll ever see her again.” He assured the other, giving him a final conflicted glance before leaving without giving him a chance to say goodbye.


End file.
